There must be an opposition in all things…
I’ve come to understand the perk of “there must be an opposition in all things”. While the devastating side of opposition is painful to the point of raw anguish the perk side of opposition is the most glorious joy. Today was a day of “the perk side of opposition” or in other words … glorious joy!
We entered the Chemo office at 8:00 a.m. with trepidation churning in our guts. What would this poison do to Jay (nausea, vomiting, severe fatigue, diarrhea, numbing of the hands and feet, etc, etc.)? We walked through the door feeling like we were walking to our own execution. We just followed the nurse right to the spot where the poison was to be administered without handcuffs or police insistence. I kept thinking to myself, “who willingly does this”? Of course, the answer came right on the heels of the question, “only those with no other choice”.
We walked into suite #120 on the 11th floor of the James Cancer Institute and to my absolute surprise the entire side wall of the room was glass. These glass windows looked over the beautiful city of Columbus. The sky was electric blue (very strange for Ohio), the grass was vibrant green, the trees danced in the breeze and if you tried hard enough it almost felt like you could see into forever. This was the beginning of our climb out of the devastating side of opposition.
Every nurse, orderly, doctor, and receptionist were kind, gentle, efficient, and knowledgeable. Blood was drawn and analyzed, history was taken, vitals were obtained, chemo drugs prepared, and insurance information gathered. The moment of great dread was upon us. The chemo drugs began to drip into Jay’s body, one drip, then two, three hours, then four. As the hours passed Jay seemed to become happier and happier. What? ---Could this be?---No side effects? He felt strong and calm and strangely liberated. When you believe that you are walking into the death of your quality of life but actually receive an increase in your quality of life, now that is “a perk of opposition”, that is glorious joy!
Even though Jay has a 48 hour chemotherapy fanny pack and it is only day one of this enormous journey---we don’t care!! TODAY life feels GOOD! TODAY life is good!! TODAY life is full of glorious joy and we are inhaling it!!!
I love you all!
Susan
3 comments:
Dear Susan,
You uplift me...Jay's attitude (and yours) is such a plus in the otherwise down-side of things. I remember being/appearing "happy" after finding out that my husband could move his fingers on his left hand after he broke his neck. Someone observed me in this state and said "How could you be so happy"? I was happy because I knew there was a healing going on. I was happy that one more day was going to dawn. I'm happy now for both of you & for the hope so vibrantly alive...and I still hold your white shawl you gave to me for comfort when I need it:-) Love you, Janet Jones (Holly's mom).
YOU ARE A PILAR OF STRENGTH!!!!!!!!!!!!
I LOVE YOU:)
Susan, you are an amazing woman! You have always kept a positive attitude on life! You and Jay are in my prayers daily. I love you both and are grateful for the positive impact you have had on my life!
Michelle (McCoy) Corbin
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